Page 67 of I Could Never
Carly: There is no WE in this process.
Josh: That’s no fun.
I sighed and typed.
Carly: There’s a black one but Christina said it looked like a funeral bathing suit.
Josh: What happened to your bikini?
Carly: I want something more modest to wear when I take Scottie to the Y.
Josh: I used to work there in high school. If you take Scottie in the afternoon, it’s all senior citizens. But I suppose you mightgive them heart attacks in your bikini, so maybe you’re on the right track. Anyway, I’m here if you want my opinion.
Carly: Thanks.
Josh: And in answer to your question, that red bathing suit did make you look flat.
Is he serious?Just when I thought we were getting along, he had to go and ruin it.Why does he always do that?
Then my phone chimed again.
Josh: F.L.A.T.
Funny
Left-handed
Authentic
Tough
I smiled from ear to ear.
Carly: You’re so goofy, Josh. I didn’t realize you knew I was a lefty.
Josh: You eat with your right and write with your left. Technically, you’re ambidextrous. Damn, I should’ve used that for A.
Carly: And you’re observant.
Josh: Evil, goofy, and observant. I’m sure you can think of a few more adjectives for me. Not sure I wanna know them, though.
Carly: LOL
Josh: You were gonna come home and kick me in the balls when you thought I was calling you flat, weren’t you?
Carly: I wouldn’t have kicked you in the balls. But I might have put a little extra pepper in your pasta tonight.
Josh: Speaking of dinner, I’ve got it.
Carly: You cook, Mathers?
Josh: I realize you think I’m only good for pounding chicken, but there’s one other thing I’m an expert at making.
Carly: Well, this I gotta see.
I tried on at least ten more bathing suits before I finally picked one.
When I walked into the house that evening, I couldn’t believe my eyes. The carpet in the living room had fresh vacuuming track marks on it, and Scottie was sitting calmly on the couch with wet hair, which meant they’d already showered. The aroma of something absolutely delicious filled the air.