Page 66 of I Could Never

“Okay. What are you going for?”

“Modest. I’m looking at one-pieces because I’m gonna start taking Scottie swimming at the Y. I don’t need to impress anyone over there. I only have a bikini here with me, which I’ve used to shower with Scottie. Don’t ask.”

She laughed. “Not gonna touch that one.”

“Okay. Stay by the phone.”

I hung up and put on the first one, a black suit with a sheer strip at the top.

I propped the phone up in a way that allowed me to see my full torso in the viewfinder. I set the timer to snap a photo and sent it to Christina.

Christina: Who knew there was a swimsuit fit for a funeral?

Carly: So you don’t like it?

Christina: Maybe buy that one and stash it away until you’re 80. But I’m not letting you wear it out.

Carly: I told you I wanted a conservative look.

Christina: That one’s just depressing. At least pick a vibrant color if you’re going with an old-lady one-piece. The actual old ladies at the pool dress hotter than that.

Carly: Okay. Point taken. Stand by for the next one.

I got out of the black suit and slipped on a bright red one. While the color was more exciting, I didn’t love the way this one fit. It was comfortable, but had no padding at the chest. I wasn’t super small on top, but I always appreciated a little boost.

I set the timer to take a photo again and sent it with a message:

Carly: Does this one make me look flat?

About a minute later, my phone finally dinged.

Josh: Define flat.

My first inclination was to wonder why she didn’t understand my question, but I soon realized that was the least of my problems.

I’d freaking sent Josh the photo of me in the red swimsuit! I’d missed a text from him about picking up sour cream on the way home, so when I clicked on the most recent text to send the photo, it had been his, not Christina’s.

I couldn’t type fast enough.

Carly: OMG. That wasn’t meant for you.

Josh: Damn. Really?

Carly: Christina is advising me on bathing suits. I just clicked the wrong thread.

Josh: So you don’t want my opinion?

Carly: No. Didn’t you think it was out of character for me to send you a photo of me in a bathing suit?

Josh: I don’t know. I thought it was kind of cool…like maybe you valued my opinion on such things.

Carly: I’d rather be caught dead than send you an unflattering shot of myself in a bathing suit!

Josh: You think you look bad?

Carly: Yes.

Josh: What other options do we have?