Page 16 of Shamelessly Loyal
Jerking around, I glowered at one of my oldest friends. No one who wasn’t a Vandal, who hadn’t grown up the way we had, could possibly understand the bonds of loyalty that tied us together.
Darkness marked the beginning of all our stories, darkness and loss. But we’d found camaraderie, support, and friendship, and we’d cemented it all in blood, sweat, and tears.
“What do you want, Kel? I’m staying fucking here rather than going with Liam to get my sister back.” That chafed. Not going after Ivy was anathema. At the same time, I thought she’d wanted to leave and now we knew she didn’t. What the fuck did it mean?
“The girl.”
“No.”
“Milo…”
“I said fucking no. She’s staying right where she is. It’s safer for her and for everyone else if we keep her locked down.”
Rubbing a hand over his face, Kellan gave me an impatient look. “She came here to help Sparrow. She took an awful risk getting in that car with Rome and Freddie, and she did itforSparrow. Holding her prisoner is poor fucking recompense.”
“Then I’ll send her back.” End of story. I eyed the heavy bag again, then just walked away. I’d wrapped my knuckles but it hadn’t done much good. The white showed evidence of blood leaking through.
I’d probably split most of my knuckles open. Whatever. Despite having showered earlier, I’d need another one. Even my jeans were uncomfortable, but I ignored it all.
“Milo,” Kellan said, stopping me before I even took another five steps. “You can’t control her. She did us a favor—”
“I’ll do what I need to,” I told him without turning around. He was right about her having taken a terrible risk to help Ivy. She was precious to Ivy. I’d seen that myself all those years earlier when I set out to just lay eyes on my baby sister for her birthday.
I hated that she didn’t know who I was, even as I took advantage of the anonymity to watch over her. She didn’t need to know us until we were in a position to walk into her world.
Not something we’d ever easily achieve now. Well, not me, anyway. Prison had beaten and stripped away what ability to believe in dreams I had left. Dreams for other people? Sure.
For me?
Fuck that disappointment in the ass with a razor blade.
Glancing back at Kellan, I studied one of my oldest friends, then said, “You want to do things a different way. Fine. I won’t fight you on that. Maybe it was my fault we ended up here and she left—or was in a position to be manipulated into leaving. I don’t know.” I hated myself, in any case. “But her friend? That’s on me. I will protect her and I will handle it. You get Ivy back, and I’ll take care of this.”
He sighed, then raised his hands. “Do me a favor?”
“What?”
“Go easy on her and yourself.”
Rather than lie to him, I just nodded. Easy would not get Lainey Benedict out the door. No, she was made from sterner stuff and seemed filled to the brim with willful mayhem.
Something we just did not need right now.
If ever…
I paused in the kitchen to down a bottle of water, before I stripped off the wraps and washed my hands in the sink. The torn open and split skin was definitely not pretty. But they were barely oozing once I finished cleaning up.
After tossing the wraps in the trash, I headed back upstairs. The clubhouse occupied a massive section of a much larger warehouse. We’d discussed it for months as we staked out the warehouse.
The moment we were in a position to buy it, we’d all wanted to sleep here, even when sleeping here wouldn’t have been that comfortable. We’d added on over time, but for the first time in years, we all had a safe place.
A place where we could sleep without worry of someone attacking, where the only people who had access to us were each other—the guys we trusted. I forgot the locks were there most of the time. Most of the time. Other times, I needed to lock it. It had less to do with trust than with the sound of the locks engaging. Prison altered what sounds offered comfort. I didn’t try to explain it.
I’d left her after the kiss, and I hadn’t slept since. Probably why I’d needed to beat my hands bloody on the heavy bag. Didn’t change anything, however. She still needed to go. This life wasn’t what I wanted for Ivy, but she might be a little tougher than I imagined.
Her friend was an entirely different story, and Ivy would kill me if anything happened to her. Maybe I couldn’t keep Ivy safe right now—and that thought scored marks through me—but I would damn well keep her friend safe.
Jamming the key in the lock, I turned it with a little bit of a sigh. The tumblers, as they rolled, clicked, and the release echoed through me. The lack of light in the room had me pausing to let the light come in from the hall.