Page 31 of Paying The Vampire

“If anything can wake the wolf inside you then this can.”

“Do you think it’s here in the castle?”

“Yes, I do,” I replied. All the tiredness was stricken from her eyes as we hurried to the repository where we searched for the artefacts. We rummaged through drawers and trawled through cabinets and flung many other treasures to the floor. They clattered and crashed and we probably damaged some expensive and rare things, but in these moments nothing was more important than the amulet.

“I think I’ve found it!” Willow cried out eventually. I always believed that some things called out to people and drew them in. It did not surprise me that Willow found it. She came to me, holding it in her hand. The silver metal was thin and had been carved in the shape of a crescent moon. There was a small sparkling jewel set into the widest part of the amulet, and a chain hung from the piece of jewelry. Willow held it tightly in her hand.

I went back to the book. We compared it to make sure that it was indeed the amulet, and both were confident that it was the case. I then gathered the other ingredients that were needed and then we went up to the courtyard where soft moss rolled over the old stones and the stars twinkled above. The moon upon this world was an old moon, and tonight it was full and sensual. I thought the ceremony deserved to be performed outside. Wolves were creatures of the night too, after all, and it required the touch of moonlight.

Willow stood in the middle of the courtyard, holding the amulet.

“Are you ready?” I asked.

She remained in silence for a couple of moments. “I’m not sure Cassius. What if… what if this changes me?”

“Isn’t that what you want to happen?”

“I don’t know. I… I have thought about this moment for so long, but now I’m not sure. How can we know if this will actually do what it’s supposed to do? What if something goes wrong? For other wolves this happens naturally, what if doing it this way has some added effect? What if I lose myself?”

Fear was etched upon her face and I wished I had more reassuring words to tell her, but sometimes life was cruel and there’s a reason why the unknown is the scariest thing. “Willow, you came here because you wanted this. If you don’t want to go through with it then it’s fine, but that is your decision to make and you’re always going to have to live with it. As far as I can see this is the only way for you to get a glimpse of the wolf inside you. Whatever you decide I’ll be here for you and I’ll support you, but I can’t really offer you any advice. There is always going to be a risk in matters like these. It’s up to you whether you think the risk is worth taking.”

She stood there for long moments, staring at the amulet she held. I waited in silence, knowing that she needed to be alone with her thoughts and that I could not interfere in her thought process. This was going to be one of the most important decisions of her life.

“Let’s do it,” she said eventually.

I nodded and walked towards her. She turned to face the moon. The pale silver light flowed upon her. There was a chilled breeze that drifted past us. The night was silent. I took the amulet from her and clasped it around her neck. My fingers brushed her porcelain skin. The amulet nestled against the hollow of her throat. She arched her neck back, exposing the amulet to the moon. I gathered the other herbs and lit the fire. The herbal scent filled the area. I began to chant the words, wishing her well. I did not confide in her that I was afraid of the same thing as her though. I feared that once she let the wolf out she would never be the same, and what we had shared would be ruined because a wolf’s natural instinct was to hate a vampire.

But for her I did this.

She closed her eyes and I chanted the spell. The jewel in the amulet seemed to glow. When I finished speaking I waited and then, when she opened her eyes again I could tell that something had changed, and I felt afraid of what she might become.

Chapter Twenty Four

Willow

I felt something washing over me, as though I had been bathed in the cleanest, purest water there had ever been. I opened my eyes and looked up at the moon, which seemed to grin at me. It had taken on a different shade and I knew that I was different inside, although I was not sure how. The amulet was cool against my skin, skin that burned with energy that sizzled inside. I trembled as I knew that something was happening inside me. It was so strange though… this swirling, heaving thing, this force that crackled and roared and howled… howled.

The wolf was awake.

It was difficult to comprehend at first given how I had lived my life without knowing it, always wondering how it would feel to have this part of me awoken, always ashamed that I had never been given the same gift as my friends. But the wolf was here. It snarled, as though angry that it had been forced to sleep for so long, but thanks to the amulet it was now writhing inside me and it longed to be free. I felt the world becoming more vivid around me. I could smell the pungent scent of the herbal fire, I could breathe in the cold loneliness of the castle, and I could sense Cassius. He was there, a few feet away from me, and a growl escaped from my throat. I was a wolf, my blood running hot, my instincts honed like sharp claws. My lip curled and bared my teeth. I looked down and felt imprisoned by these clothes. What was this? What kind of woman was I?

I felt the burning and I felt the heat. I felt the scorching waves that came upon me and I knew that I was never going to be the same again. The sensations and thoughts that flooded through my mind were overwhelming and I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to brace myself against them. They came thick and fast and began to whirl within me. My heart beat harder and fast, and this pulsing energy rippled across the surface of my skin, and all I could think was that I wanted to be free. I wanted to break free of these chains and liberate myself…

So I did.

I tore my dress off, ripping the fabric in two and flung it to the fire, where the flames caught and consumed it.

I wanted to fling myself onto a fire as well, although a fire of a different kind.

The moon caressed my skin, my naked skin. I ran my hands down my body, stroking the soft curves of my breasts, the swell of my hips, feeling this naked femininity exuding from me. And then I looked up at Cassius. He stood there, a man alone, a king without a queen, gaping at me. I could see the awe in his eyes, the sense of admiration and attraction he felt towards me at seeing me naked and unclothed. He must have imagined it so often, and now the reality had presented itself to him without him having to do anything.

I felt wild and unkempt, I felt as though I had been held prisoner for an entire lifetime and now I was ready to break free.

I strode towards him. He recoiled, worried that I might mean him harm. I suppose it was a natural thing to think considering that I was a wolf.

Yes… I was a wolf. After all this time the true nature of myself had been revealed. The moon had shone upon me and blessed me with knowing this side of my soul that had always been shrouded in darkness, and I could not have done it without Cassius. I owed him everything and I was going to give him more, and I would take plenty as well.

I stood before him, leaning into him and breathing in his scent. He smelled musky and manly, and this all served to intoxicate me. I licked my lips and looked deeply into his eyes.