Page 61 of Blackout

‘Why?’ Was there a reason Zach needed to guard his heart?

‘To protect it from being broken.’

Had someone broken Zach’s heart? ‘Did it work?’

‘No.’ Zach shook his head. Armour hadn’t stopped Zach’s heart from breaking. Had I broken Zach’s heart or were there other women that had broken it?

‘Did I break your heart?’ I couldn’t help but ask Zach if I was the reason for his tattoo.

‘You never came back after you kissed me so maybe my heart did break a little.’

‘And the broken hourglass and fob watch?’

‘That time is precious, and you never know when it’s going to run out.’

‘I love your tattoo.’ I reached up and put my lips on Zach’s chest, right over his heart and the intricate details of his tattoo.

Zach’s next words though took me by surprise, but really, I should have known they were on their way. ‘Talk to me. Tell me what happened after I left your house.’

I reached for a towel to wrap around myself as I sat up. Zach also covered up as he sat up beside me, and I was almost sad at the view I just lost. But what I needed to tell Zach, I couldn’t do lying in his arms. I wanted our conversation to be more than just pillow talk, as he had waited all day for me to talk to him. It was also the price I paid when my man was about to feed me. Zach pulled the esky closer and reached inside to the picnic he had put together. Sandwiches, biscuits and cheese, water and chocolate. What more could a woman want? Apple pie and muffins. I was overjoyed. He’d found the goodies I’d frozen.

‘The psychologist from your mum’s practice was a big help with the mess that was my life.’ I know my words surprised Zach, but I had to start somewhere. Why not at the place I went to for help?

‘You went there?’

‘Your sister recommended I go there,’ I said honestly. ‘Where else was I supposed to go?’

‘Baby, it’s okay.’ Zach’s words were calm as he reached out to push my chin up and brush his fingers over my cheekbone. ‘I’m just glad you didn’t talk to my mum.’

‘I didn’t want to talk to her when I didn’t know what we were, especially after I sent you home that day at my house. I’ve been living with undiagnosed anxiety since my dad died. I wanted my therapy to focus on me, not my love life.’

‘Anxiety?’ Zach asked.

I nodded my confirmation. ‘The psychologist is helping me deal with my anxiety. I haven’t blacked out since your birthday.’

‘That’s great, baby. I’m proud of you.’

Zach was proud of me. I blushed and felt my body almost turn to mush.

‘Did you talk about me with your psychologist?’ Zach asked, and I nodded with a cheekiness on my face.

‘I feel like you saved my health from a downward out-of-control spiral, and now that I’m a mostly organised mess, I feel like I’m right where I need to be.’ At the light at end of the tunnel. ‘Right here next to you.’

Zach grinned, and the look in his eyes trapped me. I knew this was where he wanted to be, too, with me. But there was more to say. There was a reason why we were apart for weeks.

‘It took four weeks to get an appointment about my dad’s Will with the lawyer’s office,’ I told Zach. ‘Then I had to sit there in the same room with Brad’s team of paralegals, and the whole time I was there all we did was skirt around answering each other’s questions.’

‘Ah, paralegals, how fun,’ Zach joked.

‘Not really. I wasted my time.’ I let out a huff as I remembered how long that day was, wanting answers and not getting them.

‘I know,’ Zach said quietly. ‘Is everything sorted now?’

‘I think so.’

‘Come on, you need to fill me in.’ Zach reached over to try and coax out of me the information he wanted.

‘My mum is where she belongs, working in the office of the bakery she now owns.’