Page 13 of We're All Liars

“You mean it’s your turn on Morgan Watch. To make sure she’s not gonna break.” My laugh is strained. It pisses me off that they keep hovering and pass me off like I’m a fucking porcelain doll.

Cade halts, his arm latching tighter around me as he shifts in front of me. “We’re past this, Morgan. We’re not doing the bitchy I-don’t-have-a-heart thing anymore.”

I want to be done. But I don’t think I have another mode. “Just because you say it’s done, doesn’t mean anything.” Turning, I do my best to get out of his grip and walk away. But that isn’t as easy as I thought. Maybe I did take a few too many shots. Fortunately, Cade doesn’t try to continue the conversation and just walks beside me as we make our way to his truck.

He opens the passenger door and helps me up, but I swat at his supportive grip on my waist. “I got it.”

“Sure you do.” His frustration is thick, and his patience is thin. Good. Mine is too. After he slams my door shut, he walks around the hood and gets in the driver’s seat. As he fires up the engine and takes off, I lean my head back on the seat and close my eyes, trying to relax. But I’m fucking burning up.

I adjust the AC vents to no avail; I can’t seem to cool off. “Does this not work at all?” Any air would be nice right now, so I roll down my window to let the cool breeze hit my face. Snatching the stupid witch’s hat off my head, I drop it out the window. Reaching down, I pull off my stiletto pumps one by one, then toss both out too.

“What the hell are you doing?” Cade asks as he glances in the rearview.

“De-witching.” Shifting around, I unhook the garters to my thigh-high stockings and roll them down before tossing them out to join the rest. Once I’m down to just the black dress, I lean my head back again and close my eyes. So much better. The breeze is flowing, and I don’t feel all confined by the damn getup.

A few minutes later, Cade parks in front of my house. He shuts the truck off but doesn’t make a move to get out.

“Your seat is scratching my ass.” I laugh, shifting against the worn leather before I climb over and straddle him.

He lets out a frustrated groan as my mouth moves to his. But he kisses me back as I grind against him. His hands move to my hips and grip tightly to keep me from moving. “You’re drunk, Morgan.”

“It’s not the first time.” I rock against him as much as his hold will allow, my mouth trailing down his neck as I lick across his skin. Reaching between us, I go to unbutton his jeans, but he grips me by the wrist and moves my arm to my side as I lean back to look at him. “Seriously? I’m aware of what I’m doing. I want to fuck.” He doesn’t respond, just keeps an edgy watch on me. “Fine.” I try to wiggle out of his control, and that’s when he finally speaks.

“I went to see my mom yesterday.”

The statement takes me by surprise. And my first thought isI don’t want to hear this. Because he’s undeniably in his feels. Why can’t he keep his mouth closed and fuck me? “Well, there goes the mood.”

He releases my wrist. One hand moves to my waist, the other on my face. His palm is against my cheek as his thumb strokes my skin when he murmurs, “I get it now. Why you want to hurt me. Why you want to make me suffer. And I know why I keep coming to you but don’t want her in my life. I forgive her, but she abandoned me and made me feel worthless. And I’m the one who broke you. I don’t need your forgiveness; I need to show you that I was wrong. Because you’re not worthless.”

I listen to his words. And I actually believe he means them as he speaks them. But it doesn’t matter. I don’t want to feel them. “You can’t undo the past. It is what is. And I don’t need you to validate me. Even if you are the one who said it from your own mouth… something about being worthless and pathetic.”

His eyes close for a few seconds as he shakes his head. “What happened that night wasn’t about you.” There’s guilt on his face as he watches me. “I was mad because you were right. I can’t help but play the hero. I lost the game on purpose that night.”

Okay. Didn’t see that coming and don’t understand. At all. “Why would you do that?”

“My dad made a bet with some shady people. It was either lose the game or Dustin would pay the price. And I had to save my brother.”

Yeah. I get that. Mine is the one person I’d do anything for. But I still can’t believe what he’s saying. “That’s what had your panties in a twist that night?”

“I hate him, Morgan. And I’m starting to hate Dustin for allowing him back in our life. Even as angry as I was at my mom, my dad is the one I despise most of all. And my brother is sitting there with him like nothing he did to us mattered, and he’sstillcausing trouble.” He pulls me closer; his mouth drops to my shoulder. “I didn’t mean what I said that night. I’ll always need you.” His lips trail across my skin. “Forever.”

I drape my arms over his shoulders as he lifts his head, my forehead falling forward against his. “This isn’t it. We’re not going to ride off into the sunset while your raggedy seat scratches my ass.” When I lean back, I look him directly in his haunted eyes. “We were stupid kids when we made stupid promises to each other. I don’t want to ever get married. I don’t want to have kids. And I won’t ever change my mind. Forever is bullshit, Cade, and you know there’s no happy ending.” I move to get off of him, but he keeps me in place. So, I turn a frustrated glare to him. “Let me go.”

“Never,” he states firmly.

“Oh my God. Stop it.” I roll my eyes.

“I don’t need you to marry me. I don’t care if you don’t want kids. It doesn’t change my mind. The only person I want is you. I don’t even need you to admit that you need me too. Or tell me that some part of that stone heart of yours loves me. All I need is for you to say that you’re mine. Everything else I want comes along with that.”

“I can’t do this mushy shit.” I finally squirm my way off his lap and pull the door open as I get out of the truck. He’s a step behind me.

“Of course not. Having feelings is too much for Stone Heart Morgan. You know you’re only running away because you’re scared.” His words cause me to stop.

“Scared? Feelings? What the fuck do you want me to do? Fall apart because some dipshit tried to kill me? I’m here. I’m standing. And he’s not. Fuck him. I won!” I scream, my finger ramming against Cade’s chest as he reaches forward and holds it there.

“Still lying. But I wish you’d understand, you don’t have to pretend with me.” He threads his fingers in my hair and pulls me closer. “I’ll walk with you in your nightmare every night and never judge you. Admitting you need me doesn’t make you weak, Morgan.”

I hate when he does that. Tunes in to something I can’t speak into existence. But he does it so easily. I don’t want to feel anything. I don’t ever want to feel weak again. “That’s what got to me. How weak Emma sounded.” I can’t believe I’m admitting it to Cade. I’ve hardly admitted the truth to myself. “Because that’s how I felt in those few moments when I thought Lenny would actually get the chance to kill me and I couldn’t stop him.”