Page 110 of Rise & Fall
“Hey,” I whisper as I approach her.
Her smile is almost instant, her frown flipping around and her eyes gleaming up at me like I’m the best thing she’s ever laid eyes on.
That feeling makes my heart kick up a notch, chasing the emotion she’s making me feel. Like she missed me, like I’m her safe haven.
The background noise of the girls running around and the conversation between Lori and Dexter drowns out, fading until I can only hear her wavered breathing.
“What’s wrong?” I grab her gently by the elbow and pull her into me, needing to feel her warmth.
I’ve never felt the need to breathe someone’s air, to feel their skin on mine. But I need that with her. I crave it. It’s a desire I’ve longed for, something I missed in my previous relationship because I didn’t know what it felt like for me to know I was in need of it.
With Dakota, it’s there.
“I just—I just really missed you.” She wraps her arms around me in a frenzy, like if she doesn’t grab me now, she’ll never be able to get the chance again.
She squeezes her hands into my back, and I can feel the shivers caressing down my spine.
“I’m right here, Firefly.” I comfort he, while smoothing down her hair with my hand.
I’m reminded that we’re not the only ones here right now when the sounds of laughter bursts through the air. Dakota lets go of her embrace, and we both look behind me to see the girls are totally sucking at Pin the Tail on the Giraffe, which I thought was a weird variation of the game until I learned that giraffes were Dakota’s favorite zoo animal growing up.
“Come on, DJ. It’s your turn!” Emsley shouts as Aria spins around in a blindfold before walking in a dizzy stagger toward the wall with the poster pinned to it.
“Coming,” Dakota says over my shoulder.
She drops her bag at her feet and starts to head in that direction, but before she gets too far, I stop her.
“I’m flattered, but I know that you didn’t miss me that much to have caused you some kind of pain, Dakota.”
“I’m that readable, am I?” She smiles down at her thumbs which she is twirling at her chest.
I grab her by the chin, pulling her head upward to look at me. Her green eyes are faded, something isn’t right. My firefly has lost her glow.
“Talk to me,” I say to her in a gentle tone.
“I’m not sure I really can talk about it right now. There’s just a lot going on up here that I don’t even know where to start.” She taps on her temple, and I hate how sad she looks.
“Okay, we don’t have to talk about it now. But I’m right here when you’re ready.” I move my grip on her chin to hold the back of her neck. My fingers tangle in strands of her hair while my thumb smoothly rubs against the flesh of her throat.
“Thank you, Nolan.” She reaches up and wraps her fingers around my wrist, holding me in place for a second longer.
“Does your mom know about us?” I decide to ask, wanting to know my limits. Because I really want to fucking kiss her right now.
“Oh, she knows.” Dakota tilts her head to the side as her smile curls up on one side of her face.
I look over my shoulder to notice Lori looking away quickly, presumably watching us and then getting caught.
I take this opportunity to pull Dakota into me, tightening the grip I have on her neck just enough to help her lean up to me so that I can gently plant my lips onto hers. She kisses me back, her lips a soft promise against mine.
I lean into her a little more, savoring the taste I had missed so much. If only I could hold her here forever.
She falls back onto the heels of her feet, letting go of our kiss. I feel a loss where her lips no longer touch mine. But I know it’s slow steps when we’re around friends or family, we’ve only even been intimate in private, so I respect her decision to leave me wanting more.
“I’m gonna go take my turn on the giraffe game now,” she says before walking past me.
I peer over my shoulder, watching her approach the girls who get so excited. It leaves an image of what I really hoped for in my life. What finding out that Jessica was pregnant had initially made me feel. It felt like something I was ready for, and I was. But I didn’t think it would lead me down the road of heartbreak and betrayal.
When I knew I was going to be a dad, it created this fire in me to give my daughter everything my father could not give me. It created this idea of family and love and forever.