Page 73 of Blurry Little Lines
“Let’s say fuck it to thelast times,” he whispers under his breath. “Be happy with me forever.”
I inhale to fight melting into him. That suit is well fitted, and he smells divine, yet what if we don’t work? His open arms could cradle me all night and bring my heart the warmth it needs if I let him. I know how easy it would be to live the perfect life I’ve dreamed of with him. Hell, I was doing it up until I called us off from me falling for him.
It could be so easy if I lean up and kiss his lips as his hands roam over my breasts, belly and travel south as I’m laid on the bed, trembling with pleasure. We’d spend the rest of our years with shared parenting duties and not let the kids ruin our intimacy. We are a great team. But thewhat ifstill lingers.
“Kelsie, my dick doesn’t want anyone but you.” Not exactly the endearment I was planning to hear, but I know he means well. I place my hands on his chest and back him out of my room. He knew exactly what went through my mind a moment ago and watched it play out across my face. He’s Max. The completion of my soul.
“Keep proving it to me.” I toss him a half-hearted smile and close my door for the rest of the night.
Chapter 30
Kelsie
“Kelsie, give the man a bone.” Lauren sighs and leans back into her chair beside her pool. “No pun intended.”
Since the gala blow up between us, the past month has been cordial for me and Max. He has remained his happy, tentative self with taking on the parenting role of another man’s children. Daily, he is still going out of his way to meet my needs. I’m working from home almost full time and managed to go under the radar with my now decent-sized bump. I stare into Adam and Lauren’s new pool as the guys splash around with my kids. Max looks my way with a wink when he catches me staring. But I wasn’t directly staring athim.
“This all seems like the wrong way to go about things.” I sigh, taking a sip of my virgin strawberry daiquiri. Finally, this dumpling is allowing me to stomach strawberries again. “If we do get together, don’t you think we are jumping into a relationship.”
“Kelsie, you’ve known this man your whole dang life and called off sleeping with him because you were falling in love with him. Now his daughter is swimming around inside of you.” She states the obvious in an annoyed tone. “I’d say you know him well enough to know what he really wants in this life.”
“Aren’t you supposed to be on my side?”
“You know I always take the children’s best interest.And yours.”
“I think I like you better when you suppress yourself from your feelings.” I laugh, but it’s more of a whimper.
I know my situation is different from what’s traditional. But it’s the control I seem to still like having over my heart.
“Mallory must be thrilled for this weekend.” Lauren changes the direction of the conversation—not to something off topic, though.
“She’s excited to go shopping for some baby items downtown.” I shrug. “I plan on ordering most of the things online all at once and have them delivered straight to my door.”
“That’s the spirit.” Lauren punches her fist in the air. “What’s going to happen when the baby is bigger and no longer in your room? Do you think Max can bunk with you at that point?”
“If he earns it.” I pause and ask my dreaded question out loud. “Am I being overly dramatic about all of this?”
“As an outsider with a medical point of view, not at all.” Lauren turns to face me. “As your friend and futuresister, yes.” She sighs, pulling her long blonde hair to the side.
“Mom!” Mallory runs up to us, dripping wet. “Uncle Adam said he will be at the fundraiser for my swim team too.”
“That’s great, sweetie.” I fake a smile. “Go do a big splash and soak the guys.” She takes the bait and runs to the pool. “I wish I could write a check for more than the team’s goal and we wouldn’t have to do this fundraiser.”
“Kelsie, what good would that teach the kids?” Lauren’s middle fingers pick her thumbs as her cheeks suck in.
“Nervous about the event?” I question, as her nervous habit draws me in. “Lauren, you’re hiding something from me.”
“I asked Adam his thoughts on adopting Ava Rose. The little girl who frequented the hospital in foster care.” My lungs halt and, instinctively, my eyes water.
“Lauren, that’s incredible.” Ava Rose was a little girl who Lauren found her own self-healing through, and the two girls have stayed in touch over the past year.
“Adam didn’t even think twice about saying yes.” Lauren wipes her eyes, and I reach up to clear my own. I waddle off my chair and lean in to give her a hug.
“God, even a year ago, who would have thought you two would end up where you are now.” My heart is overjoyed. “You two are going to make the best parents.” I fan myself to gather emotions, but my excitement takes over and I squeal.
“Are you girls all right?” Adam calls from the pool.
“I couldn’t wait and told her about adopting Ava Rose!” Lauren calls back as Adam shakes his head with a smile.