Page 27 of Dare to Rock

He ran a hand through his hair. “Not sure. I was thinking about visiting my mom but...” He trailed off, wishing he’d never brought up the idea.

“But what?” she asked.

He turned away, not wanting to admit how badly he’d screwed up with his family. Avery had issues with her father, but her old man deserved it. Grey’s mother was selfless and wonderful, and he hadn’t understood her. Hadn’t treated her with the love and respect she deserved. If he told Avery, she’d be disappointed in him, and he wasn’t sure he could handle seeing condemnation in her eyes when he admitted that he hadn’t been home to visit since his return to Miami.

“Grey?” Avery placed a hand on his arm, bringing him back to the present.

“I haven’t been over to see her yet.”

“What? Why not?”

He blew out a deep breath and turned to face her, finding Avery looking concerned as she stared at him. “I just haven’t been back in a while.”

“What’sa while?” she astutely asked.

He closed his eyes as he answered. “Years.”

He let the word hang in the air while she digested the information. Even to Grey, it was ironic. When he was struggling and later making some money, he’d come home. Called often. Once he’d hit the big time, he hadn’t had time to visit. Hadn’t made time, he amended. Oh, he’d sent money, bought his mother and stepdad a house, provided items that he thought they should have to make their lives easier.

None of which made them happy. Having each other made them happy. A visit from Grey would make his mother ecstatic. And he hadn’t given her that. Because he was ashamed.

“Grey,why? You love your mom, and I know she loves you.”

“I...” He stammered, searching for the right words to explain the inexplicable. “For years I was embarrassed about my stepfather’s job as a janitor. Even though it was perfectly respectable and honest work, work that put food on the table.” He shook his head, remembering how he’d avoid the hallways if he saw his stepdad at school, ducking the other way.

“You never said anything to me.”

“Because I was humiliated. Your father owned buildings; my parents cleaned them.” He hated how shallow it all sounded now. “That judgment I felt, it was part of my need to run, to get away and make something of myself.”

“I thought that had to do with how your real father treated you,” she said quietly.

“It was, in part.” Grey’s biological father had molded his mind and warped his perspective in so many ways. “I wanted to be better than the good-for-nothing son he said I was. Although my brain didn’t work like his or my sister, Julia’s,Iwas worth something,” he said, jabbing himself in the chest.

He felt a pinch and looked down to see Avery’s nails curling into his arm. “You’re worth everything,” she whispered.

He shook his head, unable to let himself believe her words. Maybe one day, when he’d made things right at home, he’d appreciate what she was saying. “I didn’t treat my mom or Ricardo any better than my father treated me. I didn’t realize it until...”

“Go on. Say it. Whatever it is, get it out.” At some point, she’d come up beside him, her soft body curled into his, as if she knew he needed her close.

He blew out a breath, dizzy with the words bouncing around his brain. “I never understood her second marriage or their happiness at just being together until I had everything... and realized I was still empty inside.” That was the point when he’d decided he needed to walk away from that life and come back, find the person he used to be. Find Avery.

“Oh, Grey.”

He shook his head hard. “Don’t feel sorry for me. I don’t deserve it. I’m more ashamed of how I felt about them than I ever wasofthem.”

She stepped in front of him and clasped his face in her hands. “That’s why you’re such a good man. You aren’t your father. You learn from your mistakes. So you were young and stupid.” She shrugged. “Your mother loves you. Not only will she understand, she’ll be so happy to see you she won’t even think about the past.”

But he would. He’d remember the real estate listings he’d sent them for mansions that required servants, not understanding when they’d turned him down. He wanted them to have anything he could afford. He hadn’t begun to comprehend at the time that money couldn’t buy happiness or fulfillment. Now he knew differently.

Now he had to face them again. And he didn’t want to do it alone. “I know I shouldn’t ask, but will you go with me to visit them? After your meeting.”

“Of course I will,” she said, her eyes suspiciously damp.

“Thank you.”

She smiled. “Now can we get dressed so I can eat my muffin?”

He was ready for a mood lightener. “Not unless I can eat your muffin first.” He squeezed her ass in his hand.