Page 35 of A Foster Fling

I hesitate to tell her because she was so upset with how things went down last time, but she really has no say in the matter. She violated her probation and has to serve the rest of it behind bars. And if I’m being honest, it’s not like she really cares anyways. When she was at home, her and Dennis would get so fucked up she wouldn’t know where I was half the time.

“The Harris house.” I finally say with a shrug.

“No way? Why’d they put you back there?”

“Don’t know,” and really, I don’t. I go where Frank takes me, and she can’t say otherwise. She lost her rights to have any say over me a long time ago.

“I’m sorry baby,” her voice quivers, “I know how bad that messed you up.”

“Do you?” I snap, “I mean, you haven’t had a sober day since I was eight. I’m surprised you remember anything outside of how to stick a needle in your arm or straw up your nose.” I bite out. She always tries to play this doting mother, but in reality, she knows how much she messed things up.

Drugs over me.

And I can’t forgive that. Not anymore. Not like how I used to when I was a kid and everything was tinted by rose-colored glasses, when she could do no wrong.

As the years went by, I always tried to give reason to her actions. I always placed blame on others—on Dennis, their drug dealer, DCF. I even blamed Frank. The thing is, if she truly loved me and wanted to be a mom, she would’ve picked me over the lifestyle she chose. It took me entirely too long to figure that out, now that I get it, I have this hate in my heart for someone I’m supposed to love.

“I gotta go,” I say, going to hang the phone up but she taps the glass to stop me.

Seconds pass in silence before she finally speaks.

“Look, I know I shouldn’t ask, but can you give Den a call for me? He won’t answer any ca—”

Click. I place the phone on the receiver before she finishes her sentence. I swallow hard, staring at her for a moment before getting to my feet and walking away.

The fucking audacity she has to ask me to do something for her.Fuck her. Fuck Dennis.

She’s missed so many birthdays, Christmases, and holidays. She missed talent shows, school meetings, and award ceremonies. She missed so many of my firsts that I had no one else to share with. She was too busy being married to the high, while I was trying to figure out life by myself.

Each time she would mess up, though, I’d forgive her. I’d move on like she wasn’t leaving me behind. I’d let go of the hurt.

I can’t anymore.

Not this time.

Chapter Nine

Liam

After I left the jail, I decided to wander the streets for a bit. I didn’t want to go back to the Harris’ house and there was no where else for me to go. Being in the system makes it hard to make and keep friends, especially when you’re constantly being bounced around, never really staying in one place long enough to get to know people. I think the longest my mom actually had me at home with her was seven months.

In the time that Iwaswith her, we never had a solid home. We were either staying hotel rooms or Dennis had a friend who would sometimes let us crash on their couch.

Home has never been in my vocabulary.

I decide to swing by the Stop-N-Go to get a drink before heading back to the house. Opening the door, I step in and enjoy the air conditioning as it immediately cools my body. This place is a run-down, Mom-and-Pop shop that’s been around for a while. I’ve been coming here for so many years, it feels wrong to go anywhere else.

Walking to the drink dispenser, I pour myself a Sprite, then head to the check-out counter. When I turn around, I see Cole and his friend in the back. I didn’t see them come in.

Sneaking behind the end cap of an aisle, I watch them as they walk down a few aisles, grabbing bags of chips and candy bars. I can’t make out what they’re saying, but the words Skate Park are as clear as day.

I smirk. I know where I’m headed now.

Before they see me, I sneak out and make my way to the skate park.

I remember going there with Gabe a few times. It’s the only one in this town. He made being in the system tolerable. When I stayed with them the first time, I would hang out with him when I wasn’t trying to get his brother’s attention. Gabe was easier to flirt with. He was easy in general.

The first time I kissed him, his words were, “I’m not gay.” But that didn’t stop him from doing it over, and over, and over again.