Page 27 of Whole Latte Love

“I need to leave. This was a mistake.” I get up and walk away.

I don’t look back. I don’t slow down. I just leave the table and my things behind me. as I exit the restaurant the blast of cool air hits me. I hear the waves and head to the beach.

I can’t go home this angry and upset. Home is my safe place. I can’t bring this there. It’ll be infected.

Just like me.

I’m not meant to love again.

I fall to the sand, curling my legs up. I hold my knees tightly against my chest as I let the tears fall freely. The salty taste suits the setting.

Theo

“Marie, wait!” I stand and start to leave but Victor stops me. “What’s the problem?” I ask him, completely clueless as to why she left.

“You know about Seth, right?” Sally asks me, her eyes on the empty seat at the table.

“Marie told me her husband, Seth died.” I look around. the other patrons of the restaurant clearly trying to pretend nothing happened. No one is looking over at our table.

“I suppose since you two haven’t known each other very long that she didn’t tell you how he died, did she?” Victor questions me.

I hadn’t noticed until now how similar he and Marie are with their features. They share the same piercing green eyes.

I shake my head, “No, I didn’t think it was appropriate to ask.”

Sally sips on her wine and Victor looks deep in thought. No one speaks for a moment. The normal sounds of a restaurant buzz around us. People chatting, eating, walking around. I can’t take it. I need to know how to fix this. I only just got Marie in my life, I don’t want her to leave.

My words just tumble out, “We haven’t known each other very long. She didn’t talk to me for a bit after I asked her to consider dating after I leave town. I didn’t want to pry before she was ready to tell me. What am I missing?”

“At the beginning of the roastery we were still figuring things out. Seth, being more interested in the agricultural sides of the business, did what I do now. He would fly back and forth to Brazil. He made multiple short trips whereas I just go half the year. Because he was flying there all the time, he became good friends with some of the pilots he ran into all the time. Anyways one time there was a storm and his flight got cancelled but because he was flying out of a small airport one of his friends offered to let him ride with them. They were cleared for flying the small plane but there was an issue. The plane lost a wing, the engine died, and they went down. They crashed and there were no survivors.”

“Marie hasn’t flown since. She probably never will,” Sally adds.

We all sit in silence. I see how my teasing brought up the worst experience of her life. Just shoving all her trauma to the surface.

Shit, I really messed up.

“You didn’t know,” Victor adds. “I’m sure she would’ve told you eventually. Outside of me flying back and forth, no one else really travels much so it’s not like she goes around telling friends and acquaintances why she’s stressed about their travels or why she hasn’t been abroad in years.”

“If you’ll excuse me,” I stand, “I need to go apologize. Thank you for the lovely night. I don’t know if we’ll be back.”

“Understood, don’t worry, we got the bill.” Victor gives me a curt nod.

“Good luck!” Sally offers a warm, genuine smile before I leave.

I leave the restaurant, unsure of where Marie would go. I don’t think she would simply go home. She left everything back at the table. I look around the parking lot for an empty bench or patio furniture. It’s still warm out. The wind picks up as I keep walking around the restaurant. I close my eyes trying to think about where she would go.

The sounds of the waves hitting the shore reminds me of the beach time we’ve spent together. The ocean sounds are relaxing despite the urgency of my situation.

I’d go on beach walks all the time if I lived here.

I find a rocky pathway down towards the beach. I gaze around, there’s a few people walking dogs but there’s no one that fits her figure. Finally, I see her.

Marie is sitting in the sand, slumped over with her knees pulled tight against her. She’s sniffling. As I sit down next to her, I hand her a handkerchief from my pocket.

“I’m sorry for what I said back there Marie.” I leave some space between us.

“I just can’t right now, Theo” she croaks, her eyes are puffy. “We never talked about flying, you don’t anything about me.”