Page 92 of Off Sides
“I left my mom’s house, left Matt.” The words sound like I’ve been gurgling gravel but Nick understands them.
“What happened?”
There’s a giggle in the background from another little kid and the sound lifts the corners of my lips.
“I was making dinner, Matt started running his mouth. Char and Matt got into it and I don’t know. I snapped, I guess, and decided I was done. Mom came in as I was leaving. I told her I was done raising her kids, she slapped me, and I left.”
“What?! She hit you?” Nick’s anger is like a physical touch. It flares in his eyes and tightens his body. The little boy in his lap flinches and Nick takes a minute to force himself to relax his body. “You’re okay, buddy, you’re safe.”
“You mad?” he asks quietly, looking like he’s expecting to be screamed at. The very idea makes me want to pummel whoever put that look on his face.
“I am mad, but not at you.” Nick rubs his back again. When he settles again, Nick turns back to me. Seeing him take care of this little boy that he’s never met is…everything. Nick was made to be a dad.
“You should have kids.” The words blurt out of my mouth before I’ve thought about it. “You’re amazing with him.”
Nick smiles and hugs the little man. “It’s definitely not outside the realm of possibility.” He looks at me, dragging his eyes over every inch of my face. “Is there anything I can do? Are you okay?”
I shrug and sigh, lying back on the bed and holding the phone above me. “I’m going back to school tomorrow. I have to find a bus ticket.” I’m exhausted and just want to sleep for a week.
“Where are you right now?”
“Charlotte’s house.”
“Good.”
36
Nick
When the call with Joey ends, Brent looks at me for all of about ten seconds before he sighs. “You’re flying out, aren’t you?”
“I have to.”
He nods and goes back to reading with Sammy on the floor. It’s fun to see him with a toddler. I know he doesn’t want kids but I think he would be a good dad. These two are special, though. There’s something about them that makes my heart yell mine. I’ll have to talk to Mom about what their situation is and if they’ll have parental rights severed at some point. I can’t stay in Colorado, I have to come back here for them.
It's a while later, after the kids are in bed, that Mom finds me packing my bag.
“Are you leaving already?”
“Yeah, I have to get back to school. Joey needs me.” I don’t take my focus off making sure I have everything.
“Oh, okay. Well, I’ll see you for graduation then.”
I turn and look at her. If Joey can stand up to his parents, maybe I can ask her about Emma.
“Do—” I take a deep breath before letting the words out. “Do you know what really happened to Emma? Did you know that night and just not want to tell me?”
She sighs heavily, leaning on the doorjamb. “I reported it again that night. You were so heartbroken over it that I knew there had to be something. Courtney, our case worker, told me that when they went in the next morning, she was gone and so was all her stuff.” She shrugs, guilt weighing on her. “I searched her name for years, looking for any kind of information. Looked into Jane Does that were found around the area too. About two years ago, a skeleton was found in the woods about two miles from us that could be her but they’ve not confirmed DNA. I didn’t want to say anything until I knew for sure.”
Despite knowing in my heart that she was probably dead, it hurts to hear. It's not for sure until there’s DNA but it’s not likely she’s alive. I nod, hating the answer, but knowing I don’t have a choice but to accept it.
“Thank you.”
“I’m sorry.”
Getting up, I go to her, hugging her tightly. She cries into my chest, wrapping her arms around me and holding me just as tightly. Watching her purge the guilt she’s carried for years has a knot forming in my throat and my chest tightening. It’s a physical weight she’s lugged around for six years. It wasn’t her burden to carry.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t fix it, Nicky,” she cries. “I tried but there was nothing else I could do without putting the kids here at risk.”