Page 14 of Say You Will

June 1, 2018

Dare

March brought lions and April showers. Sunny May bloomed an array of flowers. June first, however, brought me a wicked case of the nervous nellies. Our date the night before had been sorely needed. We’d needed to reconnect, especially since I knew it was me that had caused the divide. Over the course of the night, I’d let myself relax. I didn’t feel the need to be in control like I usually did. A rare night of Ace fucking me into the mattress without a thought to the game I knew was playing was like a cherry on top of the sweet sundae date.

Ace had long ago slipped out of bed and headed to work. Meanwhile, I laid in a while and went over my mental list. Everyone I’d invited had RSVP’d, mostly to the affirmative. The menu was planned, the rings bought and stowed in the bar’s safe. I had music in the form of both DJ and Ty on guitar. It was the proposal itself that refused to be written.

How was I to put into words what the last three years meant to me? Our mutual like had grown swiftly to love, overcoming obstacles along the way. We’d slotted together like two perfect puzzle pieces. His best friends—Jake, Terry, and Finn—were now my best friends. Yes, we’d bumped heads over exes, dealt with difficult work schedules, and the integration of families. Thankfully, his parents were just as easy-going as mine. Our siblings, the one time they’d met, were also on pleasant terms, interacting via Facebook and email because it’s incredibly hard not to bond over baby pictures.

I reasoned I still had a few weeks, twenty days to go… I’d come up with something. In the meantime, I still had phone calls to make and music lists to plan. Working long shifts meant on those days I got nothing done. Still, I was sure everything would be perfect.

Until it wasn’t…