Page 261 of The Grand Duel

I’m completely and utterly in love.

So much so, I can almost forget the rotting feeling inside of me in these sacred moments and just be.

Him and me.

Almost. Until the guilt I feel for hurting becomes impossible to ignore.

I apologised to him for overreacting yesterday, but with the way I feel at times, I’m worried it will happen again.

I cried in bed last night, thinking he was asleep, my emotions catching me off guard and getting the better of me. He wasn’t asleep, and the panic I felt when he rolled over and pulled meinto him, wrapping me up in his arms and kissing my neck…It made me feel like I’d failed him. That my sadness over this situation, and the fact my family life is a mess right now, is more than I can manage.

But I can manage it.

I am managing it.

I don’t know if he knew I was crying, but I hope that he didn’t. That I did a good enough job hiding it.

“I hope that beautiful mind is lost on me and nothing else, Lissie girl.”

I force my smile and stretch. Daisy and Luna stir, jumping up from the sofa.

I stand, pulling the blanket tighter as I walk to the kitchen island. I lean into him, and he drops the knife, letting me burrow into his bare chest—his warmth.

I breathe him in. The smell of him. The softness of his skin.

“I love you, too,” he whispers, kissing my hair. “More.”

Lifting my head, I let the worry and fear go, just being here with him in the moment.

Because this moment is the only thing I can control.

The song changes on the record player, and he starts to sway.

I smile and then chuckle when he takes my hand. “What are you doing?”

“Dancing with you.”

“Naked?”

“I have boxers on.” He palms my ass through the blanket. “I’d say you’re more naked than I am.”

I nod. “I’m pretty sure your cum is running down my thigh, so I have to agree.”

He drops his head back and laughs, a deep rumbling sound that makes my insides warm. When he rights his head, he sobers his features. Or tries to. His cocky smirk still lingers.

“Need me to come scrub you clean, baby?”

I shake my head. “I need you to prep the dinner before your friends get here.”

“Our. Our friends,” he corrects. He flicks his head to the side. “Go and get changed. We can take the dogs down to the woods before everyone gets here. Burn off some energy.” He kisses me.

“Hmm,” I groan against his mouth. “I can think of better ways to burn off energy.”

He smiles against my lips. “I was talking about the dogs.”

I chuckle and pull away. “Oh.”

He turns back to the worktop, picking up the knife again, his smile still there.