Page 78 of Bean

Kissing along his jaw, I moved down his neck, pushing his shirt up so I could get to his nipples. They peaked when I exposed them to the cool air. I blew softly over them and watched his back arch. I could get drunk on the way he moved, on every needy twitch, every desperate groan. He was trying to hold back, so I lifted two fingers and pressed them to his lips.

His eyes widened and he opened his mouth a little, though not enough for me to slip my fingers inside.

“It’ll help,” I promised. “Lube?”

“Nightstand,” he breathed out.

Leaning over, I grabbed it from the drawer and dropped it on the mattress beside him. His eyes widened farther, and I held back a laugh as I kissed the side of his pec. “I’m going to play with you a little tonight. I want to make you come.”

He swallowed heavily, then nodded. “Yes. I want that.”

“Good. Now open up, sweetness. This will keep you quiet.”

His whole body shook—just once, but almost violently. For a second, I thought I’d pushed him too far, but then I realized his pupils were completely blown, eating up all the color in his irises. He looked dazed and wanton, his legs spreading just as his lips parted. I set my fingers on his tongue, and I held back my own desperate moan as he closed his mouth around them and gave a hard suck.

“Fuck, baby,” I gasped. I rocked my hips down, rubbing my erection against his thigh. I wasn’t really worried about getting off, but everything he did was so damn sexy. “Just keep those in there, okay? Then you can be as noisy as you want.”

I glanced over my shoulder to see if the door was locked, and it was. Bean must have done it when he shut the door after Tameron. Smiling at his thinking ahead, I hooked my fingers in the waistband of his pajama bottoms and tugged a little. Raising my brows, I met his gaze, and after a beat, he nodded.

With a couple of swift tugs, I got his pants down. His cock sat fat and needy in his nest of dark hair. My mouth watered, wanting to taste it, but I wanted to show him something else—something that could be so good if he let it.

I kissed his ribs as I reached for the lube, and he began to suck a little harder on my fingers as I clicked the cap open and put the bottle in my mouth so I could squirt it on my fingers without making him let me go. A groan sounded through his chest, muffled from where I had him gagged, and he pulled one knee up and spread the other toward the edge of the bed.

“Good, yes,” I praised. His eyes shut like he couldn’t take me looking at him when I said that. I kissed his stomach, then trailed my lips over his ribs and toward his neck. “You’re so, so perfect.”

He shifted and tensed, and I realized maybe that was too much for him, so instead of using words, I bit down on his tendon as I pushed two fingers against his hole. He grunted, tightening, but I didn’t push in yet. I knew he still needed time to trust that this was good. That this wasn’t some unforgivable sin that would send him straight to hell.

I wanted to wrap myself around him and protect him. To show him the world didn’t have to be hard or cruel or violent. That sometimes it was, but there was this too.

God, I loved him. There was no denying it now. Just like there was no denying I had never loved Gio. Not in the way a person should love their husband.

I wanted a do-over. I wanted those years back, but I was also grateful Gio had taken them because it meant that in the moment Bean was here and free, he could be mine. In whatever capacity he’d allow me to keep him.

Closing my eyes, I gently pushed inside, feeling him finally relax. He let out a slow breath through his nose, then toyed with my fingers with his tongue as I began to finger him. Ididn’t make him wait or beg. I didn’t drag it out. I just bent my knuckles and searched until his hips flew up off the bed, then slammed back down.

He grunted and groaned, his hips moving and writhing. His cock was flush and fat still, leaking at the tip. I knew he wanted to be touched, but something like this had been on his list. Coming from anal alone.

He mumbled something around my fingers, but I began to suck at his pulse point, and the attempt at words faded into a moan. I fingered him harder, deeper, faster. I could feel the heat rising in his body, and through hazy eyes, I could see his cock begin to thicken with each beat of his heart.

He was going to come.

“I know, I know,” I soothed as he began to whimper and thrust uselessly into the air. “Just feel it, baby. Just let go. Let me take you over the edge, just like this.”

“Please,” he begged around my fingers.

I nipped at his jaw. “Do you want to keep going? Do you think you can come this way?”

He whimpered, then nodded, and I pushed my fingers even deeper, grazing his prostate with every pass.

“Look at you. God, look at you,” I gasped. I was rock hard and on the edge now. My cock rubbed against the sheets with every roll of my hips as I watched him chase his climax. He was so, so beautiful. “I love this. I love seeing you like this. You are so perfect. I never want to let you go.” My words were dangerously unchecked, but I found it hard to care. I could only hold back so much. “Give it to me, baby. Give me your cum.”

He sucked in a breath, and before he could exhale, he did. His obedience was a treasure. He was precious. And for this moment, he was mine. He gasped and bit down on my fingers as he let go, his cum spurting over his stomach in hot, thick ropes.I watched, unable to look away as his body flushed, tensed, and eventually relaxed into the mattress.

He was still trembling when I pulled both of my hands away, but I didn’t let him float out there alone in the void of his aftershocks. I gathered him close and let him shake against my chest until his breathing evened out. He relaxed in small bursts until he was boneless, and eventually, I eased him back and brushed his hair away from his forehead.

His eyes were glazed and distant, but they held mine. His tongue darted out, wetting his lips, and then he cleared his throat. “That was…”

He didn’t finish his sentence.