Page 28 of Love is So Mean
I smirk at her and move my hand for the door. “Wait until you start dating.”
“Dating? Oh no, I won’t.”
The doors close before I can respond. She’s so out of touch it’s almost adorable.
Chapter 15
Enrique
Iknow cancer is happening to Yasmeena-I wish I could take it away-but it’s having a toll on me. My relationship more specifically. Emily didn’t relax once we made it home yesterday. It was the opposite; she somehow became more furious. It’s as if she was holding back until we were officially alone.
Emily had dropped her bag in the middle of the foyer while I was carrying everything else. Once I tripped and told her I could have broken something, she only shrugged and said ‘good.’
Being mad was one thing but I didn’t like her wishing me harm because she was upset.
“Good? Hurting myself would have been good? Are you insane?”
“No! You are for ever thinking you could cheat on me.”
“I didn’t cheat on you! I have never touched another woman sexually since we’ve been together.”
All other women seemed to cease to exist when I was around Emily, but she keeps knocking herself off the pedestal I have for her.
“Oh, yeah?”
Emily pulled out her phone to show me a gallery of photos she’s taken when I’m around Yasmeena. She zoomed in on the photo of me holding Yasmeena on the dance floor. Yasmeena's eyes are closed with her head on my shoulder. I have a hand splayed on her back with the other near her hip. I was only thinking about the best places to put my hands that were both appropriate and capable of keeping her from falling if she passed out on the dancefloor. I was protecting her secret.
It could look like a lover’s embrace to anyone not paying attention to Yasmeena’s face being slightly scrunched up from pain.
It was a spontaneous decision that’s controlling the trajectory of the rest of my relationship with Emily. We’ve only been engaged for a few weeks and it feels like it’s all falling apart.
“It’s obviously not what you think. You’ve somehow not only pegged me for a cheater but also as one who’d do it so blatantly. What would make you think I’d disrespect you like that?”
Tears slide down her face as she looks at me with sad eyes. “Because you did. You went and asked her to dance in the middle of introducing me to someone.” Emily wipes angrily at them. “Mr. Robinson even joked saying it appears that dancing was more important.”
“She needed me-” I don’t get to finish my sentence.
“Ineededyou.”
I put the bags on the floor and sink down on the couch. This is exhausting and my lack of sleep over the weekend isn’t helping. I know it’s hard to prove that I have the best intentions without any betrayal but I’m not sure how I’d act if it were reversed. Would I understand? How do I convince her without violating my NDA?
“The champagne made her dizzy, she didn’t want anyone to notice. That’s all it was. We’ve been on a trip for 48 hours andI’ve only been out of your sight for 2.46 hours you knew exactly where I was and what I was doing, Emily.”
“Time doesn’t matter, Enrique.” Emily walked over and sat down on the couch next to me. She tucked one foot under her leg and grabbed my hand. “It’s a feeling. I feel you slipping away. Tell me what it is?”
I’m constantly worried about Yasmeena’s cancer.
“I’m preoccupied and I can’t talk about why but I’m not pulling away from you. My love for you hasn’t changed. Telling you isn’t an option, what else can I do to make it better?”
“Quit your job.”
Love or career, that’s the decision I’ve been reduced to making. Emily won’t stay if I keep my job, but if I leave her then I’ll have the kind of position I’ve worked hard to get my entire life. I didn’t come from money, everything I have I’ve fought for from the moment I got my scholarship into a college my parents couldn’t afford.
Even if I don’t humor Yasmeena, I’d still be her CFO, those kinds of jobs just don’t come easily. Quitting my job for no other reason than my fiancée being jealous of my boss could make me appear to be flakey. What if she has a problem with the next person? How much compromise is reasonable? I told her a rash decision like that wasn’t feasible especially with a twenty-thousand dollar a month house payment.
She was willing to let go of it all and accept the possibility that I may never have my status again. I like to think I have emotional intelligence but being near broke won’t make us happy either. It’ll simply shift our issues from one topic to another. Infidelity and finances are the cause of the majority ofirreconcilable differences that break up marriages. In this case, infidelity didn’t exist. It is just a matter of convincing Emily. We can have it all; she just needs to trust me.
I told Yasmeena Saturday night that I’d let her know in forty-eight hours. Knowing her, she’s going to hold me to it to the minute. A quick glance at my watch tells me I have a little under three hours to finalize this decision. A loveless marriage with my career and a child, or Emily.